This is what I feel like today.
So much for the Whole 30/Paleo Challenge leaning me out. Instead what it did was allow my brain to say, "Oh we're not going to track exactly what we eat? And as long as I eat the foods on this list only, I'm within the rules? Well, alrighty then. Bring on the sun butter/coconut butter/almond binges, bitches!" And since the Whole 30 has been done, it's been "Bring on the Dark Chocolate and Mug Cakes!"
I started half-heartedtly Myfitnesspal-ing last week, but have gotten lazy with it. Then yesterday I caught myself having the "ah, I'll just restart on Monday" (regarding portion control) conversation with myself and realized that I have steered myself right onto the exit for Fattie Land.
This is exactly how it happened before. Get where I want to be, or close to it for awhile, and then slowly start loosening the grip. And before I know it BAM! I'm 250lbs again. I will NOT let it happen again. At least now, thank God, I'm seeing the warning signs, while in the past I was totally oblivious until it was too late.
So what do I do? Back to to strict tracking of calories/carbs and I'm going to shoot for 1400-1500 a day for the next couple weeks in preparation for Megacon. Once I get past there, I'll probably loosen up the total calories, but I must continue to track. I know the Paleo gurus don't like it, but it has been made abundantly clear to me that if I don't, I over eat.
End of story.