Pressure

My first Crossfit competition is Saturday. I'm really, really nervous. Like, not-sleeping-well-because-visions-of-rope-climbs-and-burpees-keep-racing-through-my-head-type of nervous. And I don't know why.

Scratch that, I do know why. Because I give a crap this time. Sure, I always care (ish) about how I perform at whatever race or competition we try. But somehow...my expectations for myself are usually not all that high. Keep expectations low and that way you'll never be disappointed, eh?

But this is not an Adventure Race (where I at least also have Dave to blame/give credit for) or a Mud-Run (which are purely for fun) or even like last summer's triathlon, which sure, I trained for, but seriously? Me? A triathlete? I was just out there to survive the day.

No, this is a Crossfit Competition. I L-O-V-E Crossfit. Seriously. I spend 3-4 nights a week there. How I perform on any given day, against myself, against the other gals at the box? It matters to me. I've been going for a year now. Unlike triathlons or Tough Mudder length runs, I'm no noob. I should be fairly decent at this by now. Right? RIGHT??!!!

** sidenote: The Tough Mudder last Saturday was da BOMB, yo! For once, I was the slowpoke in the group which meant we got to jog the whole 12 miles! Good times, indeed.

 Zafar, Shredder, Pru, & Dave - Thanks for hauling my ass up, over and through that course!

Love you guys!

Right or wrong, that is how I feel. AND there are only 20 or so other women in my division. (Scaled, of course) So no anonymity like at a lot of other events, either. If I suck, people will notice. And as much as it should just be for fun and I shouldn't care how I do, I do. I care a lot. If I suck, I'm afraid it's really going to bring me down. But why?

I'm beginning to think that maybe the reason I feel so strongly about this is because for the past year, despite having gotten hella stronger and fitter, there is still a part of me that feels a tiny bit like a failure in the Fat Loss Dept. And that if I suck at this competition then that means that I'm NOT an Amazon.(Big girl who kicks ass.)

I'm just a big girl.

Which I know I should think is stupid. But there you are.

Yup. That is definitely what this is about. Now what do I do with this information????

*********************

On a lighter note, of my many (and there were MANY) costumes/pics

 this Halloween season, this my fav. It was a very busy season.

It's also one of the only ones I can post publicly. 

Oh Fantasy Fest, how I love thee.

License to Suck

The Out of Steam Punks finally did their first Elite (6 hour) Pangea Adventure Race. And lived to tell the tale. I'm not going to lie, I only went along with this because Dave really wanted to...and as I've mentioned before, I've dragged him into enough stuff over the years, I owed him.

The day dawned bright and sunny. It rained off and on a lot of the day. But honestly, since it's still hot as balls in Florida, it was nice. We pulled Boat to start. I like the canoe well enough, I think it's actually my strongest of the three, but that doesn't mean I necessarily love it. But the water was beautiful, calm and the best part of moving up to Elite came into play: we got to use our kayak paddles! Yay! That made for a really pleasant paddle. We noticed that not only were we going faster with less effort, we were tracking much straighter as well.  It took us a few more minutes to find CP 13 than I would have liked,  (it was on an island, in from the shore line a bit) but not too bad. CP 14 was up a little creek and feeling pretty confident that we would NOT clear the course on our first Elite anyways, we let it go to save time to use elsewhere.

I'm sure there were lots of gators and turtles on the river here, but I didn't see a damn thing. I did startle a heron on the island near CP 13, so there's that.

Back to the Main TA and off on the Foot/Tube section. Tube? Whaaaaa? Yup, the race was held at Blue Springs State Park. So after grabbing a few CPs on foot, we had to grab a tube and find four CPs near the boil and along the spring run. As a result, I saw something I have never seen, nor likely will ever see again. Dave, who is usually the biggest weenie in the history of ever when it comes to getting in the cold, spring water, jumped right in! It was way refreshing and a great little addition to the race. Not that it was a relaxing float. Unless you have ever wandered too close to a gator, I doubt you realize how difficult it is too move swiftly on a tube. And I didn't even get to see the manatees the other teams reported were in the area. Dang.

A tragedy, really.

After that it was time for the Bike portion. Blue Springs has several miles of really nice, beginner friendly single-track. Earlier in the summer we went there with our son and we all really dug the trails. Of course, we could have done without all the "tiny spiders" back then. Every time we stopped for a quick break my son would say, "I've got these little spiders on me." I, not paying attention because I am a failure as a parent, would say "Oh, just brush them off." It wasn't till we stopped for a snack I looked down at my feet and the "little spiders" were ticks! Lots and lots of them. Needless to say I think we rode the last bit of the trail that day faster than I did on Saturday. Well, I know I did. The gearing on my bike was frozen and as a result when were weren't on the single track (pavement or hard dirt road) I couldn't ride anywhere near as fast I would have normally because I couldn't change gears most of the time.

I felt like reenacting the Bike Toss from the Boar AR.

Onward and upward, we got all the CPs and headed back. Seriously though you guys, those trail were really cool. Great for families and those wanting some single track but aren't ready for big obstacles and challenges, like yours truly.

After getting our final punch card we took off on the bike again. Not gonna lie, I wasn't tired really, or cramping up or anything. I was just over the bike. Between the gears not working properly and that dang tiny seat turning me into a...what's the female equivalent of a eunuch? And let's be honest, I hadn't even ridden my bike for the past couple months. No, I'm not kidding. And I only run two or three miles every week or two. But as you know if you are a regular reader of this blog, I Crossfit. So it was a bit of an experiment personally, to see just how far Crossfit alone would get me. 

I'm so sorry, guys. 

No, I'm not.

So we rode the couple of miles on a grassy/sandy road. Not my finest moment, but we got there. Dave and I switched bikes about a mile in, and oh sweet relief! Once we got to the Bike TA we got additional coordinates and took off into the swamp. Fine, only part of the trail was swampy, and the water was cool at least. So I had that going for me at least. Which is nice.

On the way to the swamp we did our good deed of the day for another team who may or may not have lost the slip of paper with the additional CP coordinates/clues on it. As if I can say no to cute Adventure Racers. 

No. No, I cannot.

The next bit Dave really dug. It was some real orienteering where you had to find one CP, and then take a new heading from that point to find another, and then another. I understand how he did it, but it was definitely one of those times when I felt like, "Yeah, if you didn't do this with me, I wouldn't find half these CPs." Which, I dunno, might not be totally true. I've been tempted to grab a girlfriend and try a Sport Race without Dave, and do the navigating. One of these days, maybe. It kinda bugs me that I don't really do anything besides try to keep up and be the rabbit. I do hold the punch card and read the clues, ya know the same job our son could do when he races with us. 

Anywhine, time started getting short, so we left two CPs out there and headed for home. It was on that two (?) miles back to the Bike TA that I would say the length of the race made itself known to us. Neither of us could maintain our Adventure Race Shuffle (easy jog we usually maintain for all of the Trek portion of Sport Races) due to our legs starting to cramp up/general muscle fatigue. But we still kept a move-on. I can do a pretty quick power walk, faster than Dave can keep up with. He would jog ahead and then walk, so we kept leap frogging each other until we hit the Bike TA. It wasn't pretty, but it worked.

I stole Dave's bike again on the way back. My legs were definitely getting fatigued by now, but my Crossfitter brain (I'm so, so sorry. No, I'm not.) kicked in, "15 more minutes, tops. You can do anything for 15 minutes." We nabbed CP 34 on the way back. Kinda proud of myself for figuring that one out myself, thank you very much. Then took off for home. It was (literally) all down hill from there.

We ended up in 16th. Out of 24 teams. Hence, the title to this post. Had we placed that low in a Sport Class Race, not gonna fib, we'd be pretty disappointed. But for our first Elite? We'll take it. Since it was our first go and we hadn't done any additional training, hell -we hadn't done any specific training, I figured we'd earned the license to suck. Next time, not so much. 

Will we do another Elite? I wouldn't rule it out by any means. But for now, the Sport Class is more fun and still provides me with a sense of accomplishment upon completion. The Elite's pain to fun/accomplishment scale tipped a wee bit far onto the pain side for my liking, without additional training anyways. So why not do a little more dedicated training? Because life. I really, really enjoy doing Crossfit. That really takes up all of my "fitness" time. And the thing is, regardless of the fact that I actually look forward to going every day, I really do think it gives me, personally, the most bang for my buck in relation to what it allows me to do vs time spent at the gym. Last year, when we started doing Crossfit, we quit regularly just going for runs and riding the bicycles, and that's (oddly) when we started seeing real improvements in our Sport Class finishes. But to place well at Elite? No, I don't think Crossfit alone is enough. A little more endurance work is called for, I think. More work I just don't have the time, nor frankly desire, to do.

All that said, the Super Hero was another wonderfully well organized race by the Pangea Team. Everyone is so super friendly and supportive, the staff and the fellow racers. A shout out to the Canyoneros  for their kind words of welcome to the Elite Class while we were on the Foot/Tube trail and congrats on your awesome finish! 

Also, a big way to go to You're Dead to Me on their great Sport Class finish. They are local friends of ours and we love having a beer with them post race. They rock...and kick my ass when I occasionally get down to Vero for one of the Adventure Training Classes they coach.

We are adorable. And sweaty. And sandy. A lovely combination. 

Till next time, stay dirty my friends. And remember this:

Going topless

Well that title is sure going to screw with people's search results, no? If you came here for pics of topless crossfitters I apologize for my cunning ruse. Might I suggest r/gonewild? I don't think a lot of those ladies are crossfitters but they are topless. And lots of times bottomless. Bless their hearts. So why the title? 

                                       Because this has been happening off and on at my box:

If you don't like to see imperfect bodies in sports bras then,

I'm sorry f*ck you, you're reading the wrong blog.

I had been talking to Dave awhile ago about the idea that, judging from what I've seen and heard on the interwebs, there are a lot more chicks just sporting the sports bra during/after WODs at other boxes than our own. Which kinda makes me a sad panda because I am a nudist at heart, and more importantly, did I mention I live in Florida and there is no air conditioning at our gym? And let's be honest it's the first damn time in my life I feel comfortable taking my shirt off in public! But noooooooo, even the fittest chicks at our box rarely take their tops off. As a result, and I don't think I'm speaking for myself here, those of us with less than perfect bodies are left thinking, "Well, hell. If SHE isn't taking her shirt off, I sure as hell can't."

And then one day during a Team WOD I looked over and my friend (in green above) was rocking just the sports bra. So I told her how I had been feeling about it. We both agreed that if chicks like us lost their tops every now and again, then other women (who wanted to, but were too intimidated) would feel more comfortable doing it. Or at the very least, we would. 

So now we do. Not everyday mind you, but when we are especially overheated and/or feeling bad-ass. Which we were yesterday. Both over-heated and feeling bad-ass. The first Lurong Challenge WOD was yesterday's WOD for our gym. Coach smoked us of course, but we all finished well under the time cap. 

So yeah...the shirts came off.

Looking good, Billy Ray!

So I got to see this guy Saturday night:

 

Oh, to be those hands.

With these guys:

Thank you Holden, for being into Maroon 5 and not One Direction. Thank you.

Badger judges the author for putting a naked pic of Adam Levine so close to one of her family.

Anyways, the Lurong Paleo Challenge (finally) started on Monday. Yay! Seriously you guys, I really needed the rigidity of the program; knowing I gots to do right by my team, really helps get me back on track. Now I'm back to feeling like my old Badass-self again.

Gratuitous tire-flipping-beast-mode pic.

I got on the scale on Monday for the first time in weeks. Yeah I know, very weird for me. That's how off the rails and in denial I was, I. Didn't. Even. Want. To Know. That's how I know I've wandered back into disordered-eating land. As a result, I was perilously close to hitting a number I swore I would never see again. Like, one pound from it.

Yeah.

But that said, I weighed myself this Wednesday morning and I am already down 5.5lbs. Which sounds crazy, but not when you understand the Paleo/Not Paleo thing. Major water retention/bloating. Let's not beat around the bush with these numbers shall we? I hate when people do that. I was 199 Monday morning, 193.6 this morning. There I said it. I fully intend to get into the 170s by the time this Challenge is over, I'd really like to see some 160s, but that may be pushing it. We shall see. I am willing to trade any new Crossfit PRs (for the next couple months) in exchange for losing more fat. I've been dabbling a bit in r/fitness and other like-minded places around the intertubes. My big takeaway has been that you don't have to lose muscle to lose fat, but it's extremely difficult to build muscle and lose fat at the same time. Thanks to the past year of Crossfit, I have a lot of muscle. More than I have ever had in my entire life. But it's time for a "cut" as they say in the weight-lifting circles. I'm ready. It's time.

That said, here's the plan for this Challenge. All the meats and vegetables. Only one (two, if I really need it) servings of fruit per day. No nuts as snacks. If they are in a recipe, fine. I reserve the right to check new recipes/food combos on Myfitnesspal to make sure there are no surprises. However, I will not be logging every meal on MFP. Though I will be paying much closer attention to portion/serving sizes. There will be no more "Just cause it is Paleo, I get to eat as much as I want." I sorta did that on the Whole 30, and even though it was a very good experience, I did not lose any weight on it. Which I could have had I known then what I know now.

"You know better, you do better," as Ms. Angelou so eloquently put it.

So what have I eaten the past few days? I'm so glad you asked! 

Breakfast -  Bacon and eggs, with 1/2 an avocado one morning, a banana a different morning.

Lunch - Canned tuna with a salad of romaine and carrots w/ balsamic vinegar/olive oil. Raspberries.

             Left over tuna steak and a hard boiled egg over a salad. Raspberries.

             Left over brussel sprouts and sweet potato/ground beef hash with a hard boiled egg and an apple.

Dinner -   Tuna Steak and Spinach

                Brussel sprouts and sweet potato/ground beef hash

               Tonight looks like a shrimp stir-fry with zucchinni and probably half a sweet potato.

For the record, I only get into this "what I stuff in my mouth hole posts" during Paleo Challenges. I always have non-Paleo friends asking, "So what DO you eat?" Umm, lots of stuff? So this is just a way to say, "SEE! HERE! It's not all bacon and steak." 

Though to be fair...there is a lot of bacon and steak.

                                           The Oatmeal is my hero. (pic more bigger here)

I am an athlete.

The Indian River Rowing Club took part in National Learn to Row Day on Saturday. An old friend stopped by the library to personally invite me. The canal where they practice is practially around the corner from my house. Plus, I've always been curious about the sport. How could I refuse?

Here's me desperately trying to appear as if I have any clue what is going on.

It was really interesting and the people were very friendly and welcoming. I absolutely love sucking at something. Well, for a time anyways. I love, love, love the thrill of trying new things and learning to get better at them. Which is one of the reasons why I love Crossfit so much, sooooo many skills to learn and with the combinations always changing you never get perfect at it. Which is good. Always something to strive for....but I digress, as usual.

Will I join the Rowing Club? Unfortunately, probably not anytime soon. I enjoyed it, but not so much I would give up weekday Crossfitting for it, or any of the weekend activites I do that Crossfit prepares me for. But if I was retired or didn't work? I would totally make it part of my repertoire. There was something extremely zen-like to it. I would get into a good rhythm and just focus on the cadence of the person in front of me. I foudn it to be very calming, for lack of a better word.

That said, a tiny little comment by one of the Club Members made my day and made me think again about how far I have come in the past 2 years. As we were chatting, and I was explaining that I had never had any experience with this kind of rowing, she very obviously looked me up and down and said, "Well sure, but you're an athlete, no?" And she said it very matter of factly. Naturally, because fat-brain still takes auto-pilot duties a lot of the time, I started to say, "Oh, no. I'm not an..." 

But I stopped myself and said, "Yes. Yes, I am."

I do Adventure Races, they may only be 3 hour versions, not 3 days, but we usually place pretty darn well, dammit. I'm a Crossfitter. I am by far no where near the fittest in my Box, I'm no where near the bottom ether. Throw a Warrior Dash, hell, a Tough Mudder even and I'm in like Flynn. Want to so dome rowing? Hell, sign me up! I'll barely even break a sweat. HA! I'm lying. I'll totally sweat, but I'll not tire.

So yes, I am an Athlete. But not because of the races I do. Because I am out there, moving my body as much as I can, as often as I can in the time/space my life allows and continually striving to to be the fastest, strongest, most tenacious I can be. That's what makes me an athlete.     

I got nothin'

I didn't want to let down my adoring readers (all two of you) by not doing my weekly post today. However, I don't feel like I have anything interesting to share, not that has ever stopped me, so here goes...

Dave's been away for a week and as I suspected I'm having a hard time not eating crap when he is away. I'm about eleven pounds heavier than I'd like to be, I've had a low grade cold a/o bad allergies for the past week and in general am not in the best of moods. I badly want to Crossfit tonight, but I really feel as if my body is more in need of quality food and rest more than a workout. We're leaving for a motorcycle trip to North Georgia in a little more than a week and I have to kick this before then.

Last night, I did get my act together enough to make a bunch of Primal Shepard's Pie. Enough, in fact, that I'll probably be sharing it with co-workers since I also left (Paleo) Enchilada Chicken in the crockpot this morning. So I got that going for me.

So in the interest of not whining my way through this entire post, let's talk about the things that are making me smile lately.

This guy.

Who I seriously miss. I mean, I've always missed him when he's gone away on a trip or something. But things have been so great lately, that I really miss him. And not just in the biblical sense. That too. But not just that. And I don't mean to imply we were having rough times previously either...it's just..well, store bought apple pie out of the fridge is great. But homemade apple pie straight out of the oven with real vanilla ice cream is even better. I'm not sure I know where I'm going with that analogy. But the point is: he rocks.

Also this guy.

Unnnf.
I'm on season two of Torchwood and I can't help but fall more in love with Capt Jack with each episode. And if I haven't made it clear already, I totally get now why guys think two hot girls kissing is hot. (Because, HOT) But guys....MEN. Like Captain Jack and uh, Captain Jack. And Captain Jack and Captain Hart. I haven't even gotten into the real Ianto episodes yet.  Not that I have anything against two girls kissing. Hell, I'll watch two good looking people of any sex (and combination there of) get busy...but I digress.

Barrowman, bless his sweet sexy soul, is the gift that just keeps giving. When it comes to making his fans happy, the dude gets it. His twitter @Team_Barrowman is a delightful peek into his life; with pics of his dogs, his co-workers, his husband and lots and lots of selfies. Most are goofy, self-deprecating shots, but God love him, he also posts the occasional pic of him in bed, or about to go out on the town, etc. He knows what we want, and he's not afraid to give it to us. Thank you, JB for being you.

Reddit.com
If you're here, you've probably been there. But in case you haven't, know that the front page of Reddit is all that is beautiful and horrible in this world. When they say NSFW, they mean it. Don't say I didn't warn you. But I learn new things all the time via it's links. I also get to goggle young men. Ladies, check out the LadybonersGW (stands for Gone Wild) subreddit. You won't be disappointed.

Most of the pics look like this..minus the sports bra and boobs. But also abs, and sometimes penis.

Pic in honor of the SEAK Foundation's Sport Bra Challenge.  Check out that "been eating sugar/grains" all weekend belly, my friends!

Lastly, Crossfit.

Yup, even recently when I feel like a big, fat, paleo phony for having too many cheats, doing a WOD still makes me feel like a badass and that I'm not a total failure. 'Nuff said.

Hey! Look at that! I managed to pull a post out of my ass after all. As my Daddy always says, "If you can't dazzle'em with knowledge, baffle'em with bullshit."

I know. We're a classy group.

Here I Go Again On My Own

And you're welcome for that ear worm.

The Paleo Challenge is over!!!! Yay! Without further adieu here are my takeaways from living very strict Paleo for the past two months:

1. It has completely changed my palate. I am satisfied by simpler things, like a banana with unsweetened coconut and almond butter or two squares of 86% chocolate. These things would not have cut it if the sweets were calling two months ago. That said, if I do decide to indulge, saaaay a crepe with bananas and nutella at Megacon Sunday morning (drool) it is absolutely heavenly and I appreciate it so much more. 

2. Regarding reintroducing foods: I've realized that I can have one non-paleo meal, (be it bread or dairy)  and I'll be fine. But while at Megacon this weekend we took some points on Friday and Saturday (before the Challenge ended) and then went a little nuts on Sunday (first day post-challenge) and now I feel like death. I am crazy bloated, I'm exhausted, my breathing will even get rapid out of nowhere. In other words, if I eat crap now, I feel like crap. Not an actual gastrointestinal pain like some get, but just an all over run down feeling. 

Incidentally, we saw Billy West signing autographs this weekend. Voice actor IDOL!

Which is great, because once the foray into SAD eating is done, I am inspired to get back to it all the more. Which is a very good thing. In the past, I'd fall of the wagon and it would be so hard to find the motivation to get back on, aside from aesthetics and/or guilt. Not anymore.Now the mentality is, "That tasted great, it was fun, but let's get back to what's going to make me feel better in the long run."

3. Alcohol. We only drink once a week if that anyways, but being on the Challenge did make us think about our alcohol consumption a LOT. There were a few conclusions regarding how we drink that we were coming to on our own anyways, but doing the Whole 30, and then letting loose a little this weekend really made us realize how we want to imbibe as we go into the future. Good stuff, for both our bodies and our relationship. 

Seriously, if you drink a lot of Miller Lite you will not look like that. Trust me.

3. I need to track my food. I know I've already mentioned it but it bears repeating. For folks with disordered eating like myself, the mind plays games when on challenges like this. My brain sees the eat/don't eat list and tries to convince me that as long as I'm eating from the the Do Eat list it's ok to eat however much you want, portions be damned. I suppose the hope would be to eventually get control of one's appetite and hunger cues, but I tried and I just can't do it. Yet. Maybe someday...but for now I know that I am at my best self if I eat Primal Blueprint or Paleo while also tracking my calories/carbs. End of story.

4. I still need to weigh myself, not every day as I was in the past, but once a week. The scale is not the be all and end all, but it is still a tool. Also, when I do weigh myself it needs to be at the end of the work week. If I do it after a weekend wherein there might have been some transgressions, it'll depress me. I'll start the week in guilt-mode. To illustrate; I know the scale is not going to look good this morning after the fun and games this weekend. But that's ok, I'm back on plan and will remain so for the foreseeable future. I'm entering the week thinking, "I'm going to make the right choices for myself, because it is the right and healthy thing to do. Go me! Raaar!" However, if I had weighed myself this morning the thought would have been "I need to make the right choices for myself, because I am big fat nasty cow and I suck."

And I am also stupid.

5. And did I mention I'm off Diet Coke? Yeah, I know did, but it;'s a BIG FREAKING DEAL!!! Yay!

Artist Natalie Dee understands the addiction.

As far as tangible results, I'm not 100% certain yet. I know I gained a pound on the scale, but that did not surprise me. Remember what I said about portion control? Yeah. We did two Hero WODs for the Challenge and repeated one of them last week. I ended up improving my Rankel time quite a bit. Grace is this evening we'll see how I do. Inches-wise, I don't know. We did my measurements last Thursday, but Coach had misplaced our original measurements so I'm not sure if I lost anything. I have a feeling I may have lost a tiny bit in some areas and gained in others. Which is ok, once I realized that the not-tracking things wasn't going to work out for me, I really focused the Challenge on improving my health and really breaking the chemical/sugar addictions, which it did fabulously. So, a win in my book.

So where do we go from here? 

We'll be bringing the overall framework of our diet back in line more with the Primal Blueprint, than strict Paleo. A little bit of high quality dairy here and there is not something I'm concerned with. However, I am going to keep drinking my coffee black and I'm not going to reintroduce the babybell cheese back into my lunch. I can certainly live without them and they're just not worth it from a taste or nutritional perspective in the grand scheme of things. But if I want to make a recipe that has a bit of good quality cheese in it, I'll include it. 

The only other big differences between what we'll be doing from now on and what we've been, is worrying about the oils when we are out to eat it. Don't get me wrong, nothing but olive/coconut oil related products enters Casa de Fuchs, but if we're out to eat and they are cooking an otherwise Paleo-friendly meal in vegetable oil, we're not going to worry about it. It's not that I don't agree that they are bad, but all of life decisions are based on risk vs. reward and the occasional meal out cooked in a non-paleo oil is worth the reward to us.

In summary, we are both glad that we participated in the Challenges of the past two months. We learned a lot about Paleo eating and we learned even more about ourselves. We were already on the right path, but now we've gotten even more tools and a better understanding of how and why we have chosen this lifestyle. We know what works for us and what doesn't and are really happy to be back on our own again.

Feeling Good...

especially for a Monday.

I was not feeling good Sunday morning, after a super-fun night out with a couple of our favorite couples.

I feel like this picture pretty accurately sums up Evan and I's friendship. I act like a weirdo and he judges me. I'm ok with it. 

By the way, hangovers suck. But if you want to play you've got to pay. I don't even feel like I drank that much, especially compared to how many I'd pound in an evening in the past...and the fact that I was shaking my booty a lot of the night. But eating clean will do that to you.

We spent most of the night at Captain Hiram's. We ran into even more cool people than the ones we brought with us. The band, 60 Watt Sun was playing a lot of 80s hair metal which was a hoot. And the thing was, they were really good. Looootta creepers out Saturday night, though. I felt like a groupie at  a Motley Crue concert circa 1985. Of course, I never actually was a groupie, nor ever saw them in concert back then because I was 12 and that would be weird. Though probably not unheard of.

Moving on....

Sunday afternoon, one of the Crossfitting couples hosted a Paleo Potluck Picnic at their amazeballs home on the Indian River. Seriously. You never realize how ghetto you are until you go into a house like that. It was so nice to get our nom on at a potluck without having to second guess or ask what was in stuff. The food was super-yummy and the camaraderie wonderful as always. I made the Chocolate Chili from Well Fed, which was a hit. No surprise there. You don't like that Chocolate Chili you need to have your taste buds examined.

I also did something productive this weekend too! I know, right? I got my Cyber Punk head piece completed, made a good go at Rose's gun for our Doctor Who cosplay and started my Cyber Punk Hand Cannon. The gun just needs a strap, but the Hand Cannon still needs lots of work. Dave made the handle for the inside, and I painted it, but that is as far as I've gotten. I need to run by the Auto Parts store after Crossfit this week and see if I can pick the LED lights I'd like to add to it. Dave also did a little work too for his Cyperpunk costume. I was afraid his was going to be really boring, and more just an accessory to me, but he's building some silver-hose-thingees that are going to be pretty cool I think. Pics when everything is completed.

Speaking of all that, the panels have been announced for Megacon. There are several cosplay panels that sound interesting, and I'd really like to go to the Wil Wheaton Q&A. We'll definitely hit the big Villian Party at the Rosen next door. It's rare that we get to go to a big city club, especially one with dancing girls, and themed costumes and decor, etc.

Hey honey! I hear they even got that moonshine what come in dem fancy brown bottles and all! Aaaand an indoor outhouse!

Seriously though, the Arkham Nights party last year was pretty impressive, stylistically speaking. I'd like to wear my Cyberpunk to that party, but I'm afraid Dave's going to want to live in his Capt Jack costume. I'm going to be beating the fangirls off with a stick, I just know it.

This is the part of Capt.  Jack that Dave keeps forgetting about. Oh please, oh please let there be some gay, fanboys there. 

Whole 30 Wrap-Up

Well, that wasn't so bad was it? No. No, it wasn't. Ok, fine it was a challenge at times, but as I've already mentioned, having Dave do it with me made all the difference in the world.

So because I am lazy and also busy, I present to you my post-Whole30 thoughts and feelings in bullet form.

** Weight/Measurements
No, they're not the most important outcome, but everyone always wants to know so here you go:
Dave - Lost 8 lbs and 5.25 total inches. You can really see a difference on him, no doubt.
Me - I gained .6 lbs and lost 4.25 inches. Three of those supposedly from my thighs. I did not factor in      my chest measurements because I am pretty sure the originals were written down wrong. There's no way my chest was 34.25 back in January, my bras are 36 or 38s.

In the interest of full disclosure we are "counting" our weights and measurements from when the Crossfit   Paleo Challenge started on 1/14, and not Day 1 of the Whole30. Day 1 of the Whole 30 started the day after the Austin trip, wherein I was up 10 flippin' pounds from 1/14. So I suppose if I wanted to I could say I lost 9lbs on the Whole30, but I just don't think that is honest.

* * Palate Changes
We definitely adjusted our palate. Our sensitivity to sweet stuff is much, much more acute. I find myself now looking longingly at the baked goods (most of the time) not out of an actual craving but out of nostalgia, if that makes any sense. I made Paleo-friendly Bakies (cookie-type thing) last night because I could, and they were "meh." I think it certainly helped that I made them with the 86% chocolate, in that it satisfied my desire for something I hadn't had in awhile, but was not sweet enough to awaken the Sugar Dragon. Score! 

I've been reading a lot lately about artificial sweeteners and I'm convinced if I have to have a sugar it's better to just have the real stuff. That said, on the Crossfit Paleo Challenge we're still on, we can't have any real sugar, so just as an experiment I thought I'd try a packet of Stevia in my coffee. I ended up throwing it out. SO GROSS. Which is kinda awesome.

                              

This was me.

Incidentally this drawing is from Natalie Dee. I found a ton of her pics with no credit given to her. Not cool other bloggers, not cool.

** The Diet Coke Dragon Has Been Slayed!
A year ago I cut down from 4-6 a day to 1-2. But even while otherwise doing fairly strict Primal Blueprint since August, I still had 1-2 Diet Cokes a day and Dave the same. I have not had one since 1/14 when the Crossfit Paleo Challenge started, even while in Austin I just had water, coffee...and uh, beer. Dave has not had any since day one of the Whole30. This is probably the most important result of both the Whole30 and Paleo Challenge, quite frankly.

I find this somewhat ironic this road runs through Hazleton, PA. Where I have lots of family whom I don't necessarily associate with "Can Do" - God love'em.

** We can do anything!
Ok, we already had pretty good self-esteem...particularly "couple" self-esteem, if there is such a thing. Parenting, life in general, but specifically our more recent experiences, like the Adventure Races have proven what we have always felt. We're a really kick-ass team. However, when it came to food/drink we weren't always as cohesive and/or supportive as we could be, but as I alluded to in previous posts, this was the first time we had ever really been on the same plan. With our energy and commitment focused on the same goals we were unstoppable. We camped twice with folks who were eating and drinking bad things all around us, we dealt with our crazy-ass schedules and life in general without a single misstep. Sometimes I cooked, sometime he did, sometimes we ate weird meals, and sometimes we had wonderful ones, but we did whatever it took to meet the challenge. And I am super proud of us for it.

What did I not like about the Whole30? Well, for me it made me extremely uncomfortable not to be able to track my calories/carbs or weigh myself daily. However, the Whole30 is about self-discovery and I totally understand why they don't want you to do that. For someone without a history of disordered eating or maybe a lesser case than mine, I can see how it could really help your relationship with food. But for a broken brain like mine, I was getting to a point where my brain was wanting to binge, and working within the Whole30 parameters it was telling me, "Go ahead, overeat those nuts or almond butter, etc. It's not a cheat if it's an approved food!" Yeah, not good. My Crossfit Coach, like most Paleo-folk without eating disorders, seemed rather surprised that I could overeat even on the Whole30. But a messed-up brain will find a way. So now that it's over and I am just on the Crossfit Paleo Challenge I am going to be using MyFitnessPal again. I know they'd rather you didn't. But I have to do what I know is right for me. I'm not restricting my calories big time or anything, I get that. But I need that visual reminder of what I have been putting in my mouth to keep me on the straight and narrow, because my brain does not.

That said, I am really glad we did it. Dave wasn't as strict as I was pre-Whole30, but now that he has been, and has been getting such great results he is jazzed to keep it up. He's definitely gotten the energy boost and clearer head so many who do the Whole30 talk about. I don't think I felt much of a difference in that regard because I was already eating extremely clean, especially Monday-Friday. The only major change for me was giving up the sweeteners and Diet Coke...and alcohol on the weekends.

I definitely think we'll bring it back down to more Primal Blueprint levels, especially when the Crossfit Paleo Challenge is done, but I think we are both super-committed now to a true 24/7 -  80/20 or better. As opposed to the past, wherein the weekends were more 50/50.

So dems the highlights. As I get further out I'm sure I'll have more thoughts on the matter, but for now....

Day 30!!!!!

I can't believe we're on the last day! I'm crazy-banana-pants-busy today but just wanted to drop in and say, "Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!"

Also, the Well Fed cookbook is amaze-balls, you should buy it.

And you should know that everyone at Treasure Coast Crossfit rocks.

And that I love my friends and can't wait to get silly with some of them this weekend.

But mostly you should focus on the fact that my Whole30 is 9.5 hours away from being completed.

"But shaking-it is all I know."

In the home stretch!

I can't believe we are in the last two days of the Whole 30. It's been alternately a piece of cake and a total pain in the ass. But it has proven beyond a shadow of a doubt just how determined we can be, and how much easier challenges are met when we work together. I highly doubt either of us could have done this if the other hadn't been on board as well.

To further illustrate the challenges we faced, we spent a good chunk of the weekend at Daytona International Speedway for the beginnings of Speed Week. We arrived Friday evening and stayed through the end of the Sprint Unlimited (formerly knowns as the Bud Shoot-Out - it's like an All Star NASCAR race) late Saturday night. We camped in the infield which was a really great experience. The next day we splurged for the Fan Zone tickets that got us up close to all the drivers and garages. Super cool for even the casual fans like ourselves.

Holden and I are Tony Stewart fans, but somehow I feel as if I have part ownership in Montoya's car as well. (He's the first one in line to go to practice in this pic)

Did I mention it was rather cold? For Florida anyways. Most of our group didn't even stay for the final race because of the cold. It was only in the 40s, but unfortunately most folks aren't prepared for it. For once, Dave was glad for all my overpacking of coats, scarves, hats and blankets so we were comfortable throughout.

The Shoot-out, sorry "Sprint Unlimited", was really exciting. Holden and Dave had rented scanners and Holden was so intense throughout the race, others around us were commenting about it. So cute. Because we had paid for the Fan Zone earlier, we were able to go down and lounge (literally) on the track between the ARCA and Sprint Cup races. It was a really cool experience for all of us.

** My "You Know You're a Crossfitter" moment:  I had Holden hold my feet down to see if I could do GHD sit-ups on the track. (Pssssst: if you're not familiar, tracks like daytona are EXTRMELY banked, cause you know...SCIENCE.) Turns out I totally could. Oh, and I also got up and ran 3.5 miles around the track that morning, cause I'm a weirdo.

Gratuitous my-men-are-adorbs pic.

Any-vroom, we had a blast. And still can't believe we spent that much time at a NASCAR event and did not have a beer. Almost seemed criminal. Ah well. We did eat a crap-ton of nuts. Once again, to prevent us from having to eat any of the horrible choices at the track, I brought a ton of almonds, pistachios, almond butter and fruit. (along with salad and steak) As it happened at the Warrior Dash campout, we definitely ate more of the approved snacks than we normally would have at home...but meh, we're not perfect. The fact that we can go to these types of events and still eat right (even if our protions aren't stellar) and abstain from the alkeehol? I'm sorry, but I'm pretty proud of ourselves. 

You noticing a theme here with me and the Whole 30? Yeah, lots of discipline to eat the right foods, me-not- so-good with portions. That's what happens if I'm not allowed to track calories/carbs. The coconut butter and almond butter were still calling even after I got home. Bastards.

In other news, my copy of Well Fed came in the mail Saturday! Soooo many amazing looking recipes. I made the Chocolate Chili last night and had it for lunch today. It was everything I had hoped for and more. Not as hot as as the Damn Good Chili I've been making lately. Different. Just as good, actually even better IMO. Dave's making dinner tonight because I have a Scout Parent Meeting, but he has orders to make a shrimp stir-fry using the "Best Stir Fry Sauce Ever" from the Well Fed cookbook. Can't wait!

Boogity-Boogity- Boggity!

There is a disturbance in the force.

Normally, the places I frequent on the interwebs are relatively drama-free, supportive places. However, twice so far this morning my hackles have been rasied.

Hackles, I tell you!

On Facebook, a Crossfit friend (who is also in the Paleo Challenge) posted about how yesterday was her first Valentine's Day without chocolate. I think she was proud of herself, as well she should be. But one of her "friends" (and with friends like these...) replied with a bunch of bullshit about how "life is short and you should do what makes you happy. And what do you think of the woman on the Titanic who didn't have desert that night because they wanted to fit into their gown?" Are you fucking kidding me? Maybe it shouldn't have, but that made my blood boil. Don't get me wrong, I am the freakin' poster child for "Life is short, enjoy it now." But here is a woman who is trying to take charge of her health and you're going to try to sabotage her because evidently YOUR life isn't worth living if you can't have chocolate any time you want? I'm sorry, but I'm gonna practice a little bit of discipline here and there and as a result I'm  most likely going to live longer, be stronger and be able to really enjoy everything this wonderful world has to offer to absolute best of my abilities. Or ya know, smoking and overeating makes me happy. Maybe I should go back to that lifestyle, and not be able to even participate in half of the activities I do now that make my life so rich.

The exchange did bring to mind the "arguing on the internet is like.." joke which I will not repeat here. .

The other WTF is literally from the other end of the spectrum. My girl Juli from Paleomg, was given a bunch of grief on her Instagram for posting a picture of some Non-Paleo food. You have to know that her Instagram is her personal space on-line. Her blog, OTOH, the pics and recipes, are all Paleo. Though even on the blog she does on occasion talk about the times when she eats/drinks non-paleo. Which is why we all love her. Fitness and Health are her priority, but she's human  and is ocassionally going to eat something non-paleo every once in awhile. I feel it is so important for her to post when she does, because it keeps us in check. Our society is so all or nothing. Far, far too many people try to be perfect in their dieting/lifestyle changes, and as soon as they wander off course give it all end up and go with FB lady's "Screw it just do what you want whenever you want" philosophy. There IS a middle ground people. You screw up and eat something you know you shouldn't have? The diet/change does not start on Monday. It's starts immediately. With the very. Next. Meal.  It's good to strive for perfection. But at the same time you have to know, that perfection isn't going to happen.

But that doesn't mean you except less than your best.

'Nuff said on all that.

Yesterday Dave and I stopped by a couple of health food markets/cafes and still couldn't find anything we could eat. Turns out the Vegans put freaking Tamari in everything. Gah! So my version of a Valentines Treat was the same thing I've been eating with my dinners this past week. Good old banana, with no-sugar almond butter, and unsweetened coconut flakes. It makes me so happy.
Lunch: Big ass salad with avocado grilled chicken and oil/vinegar. A cup of blueberries/raspberries.
Pre-Workout Snack: I had a Primal Pac.  Honestly, I didn't like it as much as I thought I might. The jerky in it was really good, all the individual bits were actually, but I just personally didn't care of the spices in it. But I'll probably still keep a few on hand for emergencies.
Exercise: 30 minutes of jumping around like an idiot at the Aerobics class at work.
Dinner: Snuck a few spoonfulls of coconut butter. Will NOT be buying more of that when it runs out. Waaaaaay to crack-like to me.Dave made spaghetti squash with meat sauce. Super yummy. I may have also had another banana/almond butter/coconut thing.

So yeah...Dave and I have been discussing where we are going to go after we finish the Whole 30. We will celebrate with some Bakies, but we really want to stay Paleo and not taking any cheats from the Crossfit Paleo Challenge. Let me amend that, I'm pretty sure we'll take a cheat next Saturday night and have a few drinks. But that's about it. We are also seriously considering banning the almond/sun/coconut butters. They are Food Without Brakes for us, I'm afraid. I will also go back to using MyFitnessPal. I'm sorry Paleo/Whole9 world,  but I am just still too broken. If I journal my calories/carbs, I keep my eating in check. I know the Whole 30 is supposed to help you listen to your body, and I think some improvments have been made mentally. But I'm not ready yet to make NOT recording what I eat everyday a permanent thing, which I am pretty sure the scale is going to prove come Wednesday.

Off to Daytona this evening to camp in the infield with the Scouts for the weekend. All the cool kids are coming (ie: parents I really dig) so it should be a good time. Dave and I are packing a crap-ton of food, cause you know there ain't gonna be nothin' healthy at NASCAR central!

I'm the most awesome-est Mom EVAR!

If I do say so myself.

Exhibit A: Holden normally has to wear a uniform to school (khakis or navy pants with a polo). A paper got sent home the other day notifying us that Spring pictures are today, and that the kids were allowed to wear regular clothes to school. This is what he ended up wearing:

A little bummed he left his white keds at Grandma's, but oh well.

I even cleared it with his teacher, so kudos to her for playing along. What I really love about him wearing his Doctor cosplay to school is the fact that he knows that no one knows who he is, but he does it anyway. I really dig that so far anyways, he has no problem being true to himself.

Exhibit B: Our Blue & Gold banquet is a couple of weeks away so our Webelos don't have much to do besides review some of the requirements and practice their ceremony and skits for the event. None of which is all that exciting for them. I've been seeing the "Harlem Shake" videos on Reddit lately, and thought the kids might get a kick out of making our own. Here is the result.

Day 24!!!! The end is in sight! Keep in mind that once we are done with the Whole30 we are still only half-way through the Paleo-Challenge at our Crossfit. However, there are several things (dark chocolate, paleo-hacks) that are considered cheats in the Whole30 that are allowed in the Paleo Challenge. We can't wait. I corresponded with White Lion Baking Company via Facebook to find out when I should put an order in with them so my cookies and magic bars will be here for the day after the Whole30 ends. Sad? Maybe. But better than planning on going hog-wild with non-paleo treats come this time next week. Amiright?

What I ate:

Breakfast: The usual; bacon, eggs, banana, coffee

Lunch: Left-over chili. And yes, I once again blew up like a balloon. Duly noted. The raspberries were amazing.

Pre-workout Snack - Almonds. I wish I could quit you almonds, but you really do seem to fuel my workouts well.

WOD - Helen: 3 rounds of 400 m run, 21 kettlebell swings (Rxed the 35#) and 12 pull-ups (green band) Did it in 12:50.

Post-workout Snack - I really shouldn't have, but I had a couple of spoons of almond butter before the scout meeting since I wouldn't be able to eat dinner until 9:00. The almond butter may get kicked out of the house again. It's dangerously close to being in the "food without brakes" category for me.

Dinner - Threw a whole chicken in the crockpot in AM, so had a chicken breast along with mashed rutabagas and sauteed spinach. I put a bit of coconut butter on the veggies and they were to die for!

Afterwards had a small banana with almond butter and shredded coconut. 

Not pretty, but really tasty.

In these final days, I am not weighing myself...nor journaling specifics of what I am eating. And there is almond AND sun butter in the house. I predict the scale will be ugly come next Tuesday. However, on a positive note, my energy levels are closer to normal today. 

So at least I have that going for me.

Zzzzzzzzzzz

Yeah...like I'm ever so tired I don't eat. Riiiiight.

Still really dragging ass. Last night I took my first Monday evening off of Crossfit (not due to illness) ever. I felt crappy about it, but my shoulder has been bugging me a bit and the WOD for yesterday did not look like it would help matters. More importantly, I was just so exhausted. All that said, I probably still would have gone if not for the fact that Dave and I were in crazy town picking up and dropping off our son and our two nephews all over the place. Their mom (my SIL) passed away very unexpectedly almost a month ago and the whole family is working together to...well, make things work for my bro and the boys. No excuses I know, I could have gone for a run in the dark, I'm a big girl. Or at least done some sit-ups/pushups in the living room. But I didn't. I played with the boys, ate the awesome chili that Dave made, chatted with my bro and then watched a little TV and ate half a banana with almond butter and dried coconut.

As for today, I still feel really, really run down. My energy levels are usually pretty decent so I am not digging whatever the hell this is. I have had a bit of a scratchy throat the past few days. I wonder if the exhaustion is my body fighting off a bug? Oh well, either way I'm pushing through. Last night was nice, but I'm going to Crossfit tonight even if it means dragging my sorry butt in there.

Hey! Guess what? It's Day 23 of the Whole 30!! One week to go! Woot!

This is what I ate on Day 22:
Breakfast: Bacon, banana, coffee and two scrambled eggs. I've started adding a couple of teaspoons of coconut milk to my eggs before I cook them. Good stuff. Oh, coconut milk! Is there nothing you can't do?

Lunch: Salad with shrimp, cucumber, mushrooms, romaine, and cauliflower with one tablespoon each or olive oil and balsamic vinegar. Also a cup of blackberries/raspberries.

Dinner: Damn Good Chili, that my loverly husband made for us. Followed by half a banana with a heaping tablespoon of almond butter and dried, unsweetened shredded coconut sprinkled on top. I had a sudden realization last night that perhaps I have a nightshade allergy. Naturally, I have been super-hyper-focused on my body lately...particularly my belly. The way it inflates and deflates over the course of the day absolutely fascinates me. I really should have taken a picture, because even Dave and Holden were surprised...because after eating the chili I grew a food baby like you would not believe. Seriously. I'm talking 7 months pregnant at least. I brought leftovers in for lunch today, and same deal. BOOM!

Really old references FTW!

Sorry, time warp. Couldn't be helped.

Seriously. Where the hell did this week go? Missed two days of blogging and barely realized it.

Yeah. That.

 And I can't even blame the family because Dave's in Deland taking care of a friend and Holden has been staying at my mom's the last two days helping with his cousins.

But lest you fear my two day disappearance meant I'd fallen off the Whole30 wagon,

I'm sorry. I just wanted an excuse to use this pic.

'Cause to be honest, though I have no fear that I will complete the Whole 30 without any cheats, it has been dang hard, and quite frankly is getting harder. Not gonna lie, I felt like a mild panic attack was starting when I was in Publix last night. The fact that I was just totally surrounded by bad choices was really freaking me out for some reason. Same thing happened in CVS the day before. The Whole30 has opened my eyes (even more than the Primal Blueprint did) to how absolufuckinglutely surrounded by bad choices we are nearly 24/7. 

I also have to fess up to weighing myself. I'm sorry. I can't not weight myself and not journal. At this juncture I'm at the same weight I was when I left for Austin. (I started the Whole 30 the day after we returned) Which kinda bums me out a little, as I'd really hoped to be down more than that by Day 19. But I guess the flip-side is, Austin was going to happen either way and a detox after that trip was definitely needed. Just kinda sucks that it takes 3 weeks to make up for 4 days/10lbs. (sigh)

Not going to get depressed over it. An old friend who I don't get to see nearly enough invited me out to a Country place to see a band tonight, so out I shall go. And in this situation, for several reasons (safety, late night IHOP visits, etc) I'm very glad I won't be drinking at all tonight.

******

Some things I've been eating the past couple days in no particular or detail...(What? I'm not journaling, how am I supposed to remember what I ate two days ago?)

Mega-breakfast!

I made Rabbit Stew on Tuesday. Yup. You read that right. I'd seen it at the Mexican Butcher's in town and always wanted to try it. It was...ok. Some parts of it tasted, yes, like chicken...but other parts were kinda gamey. But it was edible and I'm glad we tried it. Holden loved it. Dave pretty much felt like I did about it.

Other than the Turkey Leg at the Warrior Dash, I ate out for the first time on the Whole30 on Wednesday. We went to a Thai place and after almost having a panic attack due to not finding anything on the menu compliant , I settled on a grilled beef salad, plain. I brought my own oil and vinegar like a good girl.

Last night, I had to cook for just myself again and had nothing that wasn't frozen (hence the panic inducing stop at Publix last night) and ended up making myself coconut shrimp. It was actually really good, but I made too much. I felt like I overate it and I still threw some away. (sigh) I'll get this shit right one day

Ugly, but tasty.

In the exercise realm, did Crossfit as usual Tuesday and Wednesday and the silly aerobics at work yesterday. On Wednesday we did the Hero WOD Loredo, named for .S. Army Staff Sergeant Edwardo Loredo, 34, of Houston, Texas, assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 508th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 82nd Airborne Division, based in Fort Bragg, North Carolina, may he rest in peace. We had a cut-off time of 35 minutes and I did it with 15 seconds to spare. For the record, walking lunges are like time-delayed burpees. They suck. I'm so sore it hurts to sit in a freakin' chair right now. But then I think about how much better my ass and legs and looking and then I feel better.

Have a wonderful weekend and stay classy inter-tubes!